August 10, 2005 | 8:46pm

As the Timbers entered Canada to take on the reining ULS champions the Montreal Impact, a Canadian customs agent heckled the team. "You know the Impact have only lost one game, right?" he asked arrogantly.

Oh contraire! As of tonight, the Montreal Impact have lost two games this season, because our boys took them down! And not only did the Timbers beat Montreal, it was Montreal's first loss at home this season! Oh, the joy!

Anything else you'd like to declare, Mr. Smug Customs Agent?

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